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Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons

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1. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-09-13 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-09-13 Pub. Date: 2017-09-13
Image Number: 162830
Caption: Mr McConnell and Mr. Ryan Remember. Well, you know what they say in Washington if you want a friend … get a dog. Mueller Investigation. Welcome to the Kushners.
     
2. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-08-06 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-08-06 Pub. Date: 2017-08-06
Image Number: 161457
Caption: That's right! I won the most stupendous vote in the history of the world, and you can't believe the lying media. They don't even speak English … and Hillary is a Russian spy, of course, you knew that … by Gumphrey Daniels … Ain't that nice for the president to come and tell pa how things are ... Why, of course, ma, we his people ... The Base.
     
3. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-07-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-07-20 Pub. Date: 2017-07-20
Image Number: 160707
Caption: Russian Lawyer Lady Natalia Veselnitskaya, Former Trump Whisperer, Questioned by Vladimir Putin. Oh, Great One, we have misjudged the Americans. They are crazy but not stupid.
     
4. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-05-08 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-05-08 Pub. Date: 2017-05-08
Image Number: 157992
Caption: Russian Attempt to Hack French Elections Fails. What went wrong? We used the same hacking tricks!! They worked on the Americans!! What? Comrade Putin says return to Moscow immediately? Gulp! Gulp!
     
5. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-04-24 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-04-24 Pub. Date: 2017-04-24
Image Number: 157466
Caption: Mr. Sessions Instructs American Cities They Better Cooperate With the Feds. Ok, pay attention. This is a strongly worded letter … LA. Philly. New York. Chicago. Boston. Eh … You better obey … er um … er …
     
6. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-03-25 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-03-25 Pub. Date: 2017-03-25
Image Number: 156369
Caption: Form 1040. Department of the Treasury. Internal Revenue Service. U.S. Individual Income Tax Return. 2016. OMB No. 1545-0074. IRS Use only - Keep your greasy fingers off this space. For the year Jan. 1 - Dec. 31, 2016 (And thank God THAT's over!). 2016 ending. 20. See separate instructions. Your Name (Phonetic Spelling). Your Name Used on Dating Service (Attach Recent Photograph). Your Social Security Number. Your gang or mob name (Ex: Louise Pepperoniface, etc) Your Travel Name (Do Not Use Mohammed). Your Other Social Security Number. Address of Your House Before Foreclosure. Crappy apt. you moved to. Bass Ale! How about a cold one right now? (adv.) City, State or Exit from Jersey Turnpike (if you have foreign address, go there and wait for instructions.) Presidential Election Campaign. Checking Here Will Not Make a Damn Bit of Difference. You. Whatshername. Instructions: Drop Dead. Except for Canada, Canada still OK. Eh? Filing Status. Or Fling Status. (It is later than you think.) 1. Single (in the Republican sense of the word). 2. Married Filing Jointly (include all arguments). 3. Married Filing Separately (include sex of partner if you remember). 4. Head of Household (are you the person who sits with head in hands and wonders how you are going to feed all these mistakes, er dependents?) Enter names of dependents. Write small. 5. Qualifying widower. Enter golf handicap. Exemptions. See Publication EXX "Exemption to Exemptions to Exemptions". If more than four exemptions, or if some exemptions have four legs check here. 6a. Yourself. (That's right, you, stupid. If you are not yourself, who did you claim to be?). b. Spouse (or anyone who thinks they should be) (That's a funny word. "spouse") c. Dependents: 1 First name. Nom de plume or AKAs. Phonetic Social Security Number. Last known address? Does this dependent follow instructions? (See instructions). Boxes checked. No. of children who had live-in girlfriends/boyfriends. Had their divorced spouses living with you. You asked to leave but they had no place to go. Add numbers on lines above. (OK to use fingers). d. Total number of exemptions claimed (Round up to nearest 3/5's). Income. Attach forms here. Attach a couple of Andy J's while you're at it, to speed processing. Your ad here! Read by millions! Contact IRS Media. Helpful Hint. We are not going to give you any helpful hints. 7 Wages, salaries, tips, bottle deposits, bribes, free lunches, coins found in couch cushions. 8a Taxable interest. Attach Schedule B. If you don't understand, go to plan B. b. Tax-exempt interest. Much more interesting, isn't it? 9a Ordinary dividends. Nothing special, just Joe the Dividend. b Qualified dividends. Big Whoop. Trump's Rich Friends. 10. Taxable Refunds. Bank error in your favor. Pass GO, collect 200. 11. Alimony received (if that bum ever paid up). 12. Business Income or (loss). Use Schedule EZ come, EZ go. 13. Capital gain of (loss). Include your share of the national debt. 14. Other gains or (losses). Check box if you are just making stuff up. 15a. IRA distributions. b. Amount you had with Lehman. 16a. Pensions and annuities. b Amount with State of Illinois. 17. Rental real estate, royalties, partnerships (Use Schedule X to report missing partner). 18. Farm Income or (loss), Attach Schedule F (Do not include the funny farm). 19. Unemployment compensation (Amazing isn't it? You get taxed on this, too). 20a. Social Security benefits b. Taxable amount. 21. Other Income. (Bake sales, washing cars, baby-sitting, bingo games, don't hide anything). 22. This is your total income. Unless you are General Electric. If so write zero. Adjusted Gross Income. Remember you can file this form electronically, using your computer, and really mess things up. 23 Educator expenses (Spankings, noogies, butt-kicking). 24 Certain business expenses that you as a mere nobody have no business knowing about. Just keep moving. 25 Health savings account deduction. (May make you sick.) 26 Moving expenses. (See instructions). 27 Instruction tax. 28 Self-employment tax. 29 Self-enjoyment tax. 30 Penalty for early withdrawal (One-half of self-enjoyment tax). 31a Alimony paid. Rat out spouse's SSAN. 32 USSR tax (Useless Social Security Recipients). 33 Student loan interest (Do not include English majors). 34 Lack of interest in being a student. 35. Add up lines one to a million, divide by twice the total sum of your weight in Chinese running shoes. If greater than one-half of total something, go forth and multiply. 36. This is your adjusted gross income (Adjusted? We mean disgusted.) Now we can go to page two, tra-la. Last thought: Any money or thing of worth laying around? Better send it in. Just in case. Hey, you never know. Cat. No. 11320B. Form 1040 (2016).
     
7. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-02-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-02-20 Pub. Date: 2017-02-20
Image Number: 154967
Caption: Nixon in the Underworld. It's the Republican party … they miss you. DNR. Add oil daily.
     
8. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2017-01-02 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2017-01-02 Pub. Date: 2017-01-02
Image Number: 153023
Caption: Putin Says He Will Not Expel 35 American Diplomats. But Mr. President, we must punish these Americans. They are still here, aren't they? Oooh, he is so smart! Da. Nyet.
     
9. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-11-29 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-11-29 Pub. Date: 2016-11-29
Image Number: 151729
Caption: What About Those Two Million More People Who Voted for Clinton? Darling don't feel bad … obviously they were all illegal voters … Now, bo de wee nosey …
     
10. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-10-28 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-10-28 Pub. Date: 2016-10-28
Image Number: 150423
Caption: Pentagon Demands Signing Bonuses Back From Soldiers After they Return From War Zone. Well, yes, it was our mistake. But think how much more patriotic you look to the folks back home. Pento.
     
11. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-10-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-10-20 Pub. Date: 2016-10-20
Image Number: 150125
Caption: Melania is Mad. I am hating on thees Beely Boosh! He ees make thee bad veedeeo of my hoosbin, saying thee bad theengs. My hoosbin is like a little boy. Sometimes he theenks he ees een the locker room at hees school weeth these other leetle boys. So they are talkeeng about many theengs. Sometimes they talk about thee poosee? Poor leetle poosee. What! Dammit! Do I have to do everything abour here? Feed the dog? Feed the cat? Clean the pool ...
     
12. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-08-29 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-08-29 Pub. Date: 2016-08-29
Image Number: 148162
Caption: Mr. Erdogan Leads Turkey. They started it Turkey. Welcome to Syria & B. Assad, prop.
     
13. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-08-11 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-08-11 Pub. Date: 2016-08-11
Image Number: 147372
Caption: Good News! Marco Rubio I Back in the Game! Hey! Good news! I am back in the game! I am running again for the Senate from Florida! I know I said I was through with politics, but, holy frijoles, the country needs me. Li'l Marco. So if Trump gets the boot, I'll be ready to step in with the leadership we need. Oh boy, I can sense how relieved you are. And another thing ... (glug!) if they dump Pence ...
     
14. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-07-18 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-07-18 Pub. Date: 2016-07-18
Image Number: 146329
Caption: Nominee Pence Has Problems with Reflections. Amazing what they can do with Photoshop, isn't it?
     
15. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-07-12 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-07-12 Pub. Date: 2016-07-12
Image Number: 146048
Caption: China claims some new islands prove they own the South China Sea. Wait a minute ... I don't remember that one. Part of China. South China Sea Map 1950. That looks like something created recently. Mmmmm. Let a thousand egg rolls blossom.
     
16. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-06-28 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-06-28 Pub. Date: 2016-06-28
Image Number: 146010
Caption: With Justice Scalia in Hell. Daily Cinder Damnation Information. Cinder. Supremes Block Texas Abortion Law. Look at that! I'm not gone six months and they've already screwed things up. You should have taken better care you yourself.
     
17. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-31 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-31 Pub. Date: 2016-05-31
Image Number: 144100
Caption: Cable News Now Available in Hell. So gentlemen, they are saying Fascism is back! Trump is a fool! Where are his thugs? Were are his brown shirts? Good chin thrust, though
     
18. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-25 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-25 Pub. Date: 2016-05-25
Image Number: 143834
Caption: British to Vote on Leaving the European Union. Did they throw me out? Certainly not! I threw myself out! We British are very independent, innit. Europe.
     
19. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-04-05 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-04-05 Pub. Date: 2016-04-05
Image Number: 141757
Caption: On the Campaign Trail. What the hell is the matter with these people? Don't they understand money? Don't they understand inevitable? Welc to Wisco
     
20. Cartoonist Jeff Danziger  Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons 2016-03-20 they 
Cartoonist(s): Jeff Danziger
Comic/Cartoon: Jeff Danziger's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-03-20 Pub. Date: 2016-03-20
Image Number: 140975
Caption: McConnell Explains. The Senate will refuse to consider a candidate until after the election. The American people should have the right to decide But I'll decide when they decide.
     
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